To begin with, I hope no one has ever gotten this angry. If you have, I’m confident all the powers of science and medicine wouldn’t help you.
I’ve asked countless people, “Why do we get angry?” And I’ve gotten equally countless responses. Most people described anger or situations that made them angry, but no one seemed to have hit it on the head.
The standard definitions leave you wanting more. Such words like “belligerent,” “annoyance,” “hostility,” don’t quite scratch the itch on your back.
Here are three common reasons that trigger anger.
Righteous Anger: A car runs over a dog, a cat and wipes out a flock of seagulls. And the driver never slowed down.
In this situation, everyone would like to find the maniacal driver and throw him into an industrial-sized dryer and crank the temperature to max. But as we are civilized people, we’ll settle for a good ‘ol South Bronx beat-down.
The anger most of us encounter, however, are provocation and betrayal. Let’s take a look at both and see what we get.
1. When we’re actively provoked.
I was watching a movie in a theatre the other day and I got up to use the bathroom.
No big deal. I’d do my thing and go back to watching the rest of “Captain America: Civil War” in 5D. But there was one problem.
Yup. How the hell did I miss it? Probably because they had those sani-seats. And I remembered using the last one. Then I heard the toilet flushing right next to me. Woo-hoo!
“Excuse me, you think you could pass me some toilet paper?” I asked.
All I heard was the stall door opening and a dude walking out. While washing his hands, I’m thinking maybe he didn’t hear me. “Yo, my dude, can you help a man out? I’m kinda stuck here.”
The dude shut off the faucet and casually dried his hands. “I could help you out, but that would require effort.”
“My, man, if you don’t throw me some toilet paper, it’s going to take me no effort to flush your face down the toilet I’m sitting on,” I barked.
The dude left. I mean, he just cold-stone left me. But two-seconds later, another dude walked in.
“Yo, buddy, can you help a man out? I need toilet paper,” I said.
He chuckled at my plight. “Oh, man-oh-man, I’ve been in that situation myself on more than one occasion,” he replied.
“Thanks for sharing that. It makes me feel so much better.” Not really.
The new guy walked into the stall next to mine and began tearing off toilet paper. Then I looked up and saw a long arm gripping enough toilet paper to service three asses.
“You could just drop it,” I said.
“That’d be too easy,” he responded.
Hm. Something smelled rotten, and it wasn’t my turd.
“How much?” He asked.
“The whole thing,” I retorted.
“No, no, you misunderstand, how much is this toilet paper worth to you?”
Last straw; I lost it after that. I’m not gonna say how it ended, but a lot of shit went down.
2. The next type of anger is the flip side: Betrayal.
See this woman? She has nothing to do with this post. But I thought I’d use her image because she’s pretty damn cute.
Getting back on topic, have any of you dudes or dudettes ever caught your significant other cheating on you?
If you have, you know it goes beyond hurt. It’s like a trident spear ripping through your heart, appearing on the other side dripping with pieces of flesh.
Then the anger — the furious anger — kicks in like the Karate Kid. I’m talking about the kind of sound and fury that makes you wanna turn prehistoric and climb the Empire State Building.
But to what end? Anger doesn’t pay. So many of us have different belief systems, such as who should be the one to put down the toilet seat, that we will continue to repeat the same patterns of negative behavior unless we actively try to change our ways.
Folks, meet Manu Dawson of Integral Yoga Institute, located in lower Manhattan. This man is an accomplished mind-master. I’m not saying he can levitate things or compel a woman to take off her blouse, but I am saying he can help you rethink of your mind and body as a vehicle for change and not a vehicular accident waiting to happen.
This Saturday, please join Manushiva in a workshop at Integral Yoga Institute at 227 West 13th Street (between 7th and 8th avenues), 1:30-3:30 pm. Without change, we can’t evolve. And leading a healthier, better life begins with personal evolution. This is where Brain Wellness workshop becomes vital.
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